Doglife

Sex as a sport

Living in a Red-State or claiming a puritanical religion does not really indicate a lesser interest in sex, as the red-state obsession with adult material indicates. Clearly there is a market there that is in the closet and willing to indulge themselves only in private because sex has a negative stigma. I suppose that one way to make sex, and also porn, more publicly palatable would be to market it as a sport. A contest of fitness and skill and will. A version of wrestling where the winner gets certain benefits, or perhaps some kind of who-can-orgasm-first contest. Before you dismiss this, let me point out why this could work, how the athleticizing of sex would make it more acceptable:

Not for “pleasure”
The moral objection to sex is rooted in the fact that sex is pleasurable for most people. If the objective of intercourse is, say, for procreation, the it loses it’s offensiveness to moralists. In that case you clearly are not doing it for recreation, therefore you are not a hedonist or whoremonger. Well here you go, a reason to do it that involves competition instead of erotic bliss.

Feminism
Here we have an arena in which men and women could compete as equals and individuals. It’s about skill, not about upper-body strength or predatory instincts. Sex is the one arena in which men and women operate as equals in real life as well.

It is not all that different from many sports
Thing about the amount of close contact between MMA fighters on the floor, or boxers clinching, or basketball players posting up. Think about the nudity in professional wrestling, diving, tennis, bodybuilding. The only thing missing is penetration and heterosexuality.

Local sex leagues
These will provide all the benefits of any kind of local competition, like college or Olympic sports with the same tribal mentality and vicarious conquest. Conservatives love competition, and the lust for victory may eventually outstrip any prudishness.

Football with babies

In the future we will play football with babies, you know, to increase the stakes a little bit and make sure everybody “takes care of the ball”. Don’t worry, though, they will not be real babies, just clones. Clones will be the new black people by then. How it will work is that we will start out with robotic babies. Imitation babies. They will look real but not really be real, so that the spectators, the fans will be eased into this notion of something really being at stake here. If the baby dies there will be more, you will have a baby-holder with NFL certified babies. The babies will have to be of a standardized length and weight, so that most likely they will be clones of the same person, a white person so as not to send any racist messages. This move to baby-ball will discourage wide-receivers and running backs from spiking them, as that will be seen as “cruel”.

Basketball will not be so easy, though I foresee it being more of a contact sport than it presently is, with pads and helmets. Maybe gun-ball would be better. Dribble and shoot. Each team outfitted with bulletproof vests and 9mm handguns. Maybe the ball will have a small bomb instead and the timer on the bomb will be used instead of a shot-clock. Instead of dunking on somebody you get to shoot them at close range. Why not?

The fact is that porn has nowhere to go from here unless we make something currently illegal, legal. There is too much money to be made from jaded perverts in society. Maybe snuff-films with terminally ill people (think that girl in Fight Club) or bestiality, or necrophilia. The fact is that we are running out of orifices that can be fisted (the oral-fisting thing just is not going to take off), and that experiment with girls eating feces, the test to see how popular it would be, that didn’t really work either except as a spectacle in grossness and to see how far chicks would go when given attention.

Society is jaded and wanting more. The morality of government will have to relax to deal with this, all those ever-hungry perverted imaginations.

The hypocrite market

Search the word “pornography” on Amazon and you find all these books telling you how to break the addiction, search for “porn”, however, and you find other books that seem to hold a positive view of it.

The anti-porn books, I suspect are aimed more at the wives of guys who watch it than at the guys themselves. It’s the kind of book a woman gets for a man as a part of an ultimatum to stop or get a lawyer. They frame it as an addiction, which would make it an easy problem to solve, simply find something more important to replace it, which is the solution to all addictions. There, problem solved in one sentence, no need for a book. But they saw a market (these control-freak wives) and they exploited it with books that are useless.

By framing it as an addiction in the first place you give it a ton of power, ranking it up there with heroin and crack, but it’s not really an addiction is it? If it is normal for people to want sex, then wanting sex in itself is not abnormal, and porn-consumption can be a symptom of this. If you can’t miss an NFL game during the season, and spend the off-season watching old highlights and closely following the draft, then you are not an addict, just a really big fan. But Porn has that evil, sex, and must be characterized differently. You can’t be a porn-fan, you have to be some kind of psychological cripple who should be in rehab.

These books an example how to play on the insecurities and hypocrisy of other people and make money doing it.

Are vaginas really all that awesome or is the female withholding of them just a ploy to drive the value up?

If every woman was a slut would there be a market for pornography? For prostitutes? Probably not. But never discount the stupidity of the market. People pay for bottled water. There is the fact that it supposedly tastes better, is cleaner, and you get the appearance of more disposable income than the guy who drinks from the tap. In a world of freely available vaginas and undiscriminating women, there may still be value in being able to show off by paying for some. Prostitutes would be like Jewelry and pointless accessories for you car. You could say you were looking at porn because you were just so tired of the real-life chicks, thus proving that you were a man of distinction.

Note also that women have freely available penises at present and it just seems to have made them more picky. The glut in the heterosexual penis-market allows women to choose based on other factors apart from willingness to have sex. It is not unreasonable to suppose that if a working female aphrodisiac were to be invented and introduced into the public water-supply, that men would, after the initial phase of excitement, be more and more reluctant to have sex.

So yes, the value is being driven up. But is it being driven up by women? The answer to this question is a definite probably not. Religion is a part of the reason women are less willing to have sex, as well as male cockblocking. No guy wants a world in which other guys get to have sex and they don’t, hence the adoption of rules (by old guys) to restrict coitus. This is why the invention of erection drugs is such a big deal. The old guys who control things don’t want to see morals collapse completely just when they are too old to take advantage of them, they now have a shot at participating when there are orgies in the streets, which means that orgies in the streets are more likely to occur now than they were, say 10 years ago. Religion, for the most part, likes the no-sex thing because it creates a tension that can then be funneled towards other ends. Try getting somebody to strap a bomb to themselves when they know they can go get laid.